A Map for the Reentry Maze: A Review of Returning Well by Melissa Chaplin
One of the biggest frustrations in reentry is the lack of a guide. Everyone talks about culture shock when you leave, but very few people prepare you for the shock of coming home. That’s why I recommend Melissa Chaplin’s Returning Well: Your Guide to Thriving Back “Home” After Serving Cross-Culturally. Even though it’s written with Christian cross-cultural workers in mind, its structure and insights apply broadly to anyone navigating the emotional, spiritual, and practical challenges of repatriation.
This book isn’t just a read—it’s a process. And it might be one of the most helpful companions you can have on your return journey. While you could use this on your own, it is even more beneficial to work through the book with a friend, personal guide, companion, or coach.
Returning Well is essentially a workbook. It walks you step-by-step through your reentry experience using guided questions, prompts, and space to reflect. It invites you to pause, remember, grieve, and reimagine.
Key Features:
Divided into 10 personalized sessions
Scripture-based reflection (can be adapted for readers of any background)
Encourages processing of both positive and painful memories
Designed to be facilitated, but effective solo
Offers opportunities to craft a meaningful vision for what’s next
Each session builds on the previous one, leading you from the rawness of return to a more integrated understanding of what your time abroad meant—and what it can still mean for your life moving forward.
The Strengths
1. The Structure Gives You Breathing Room
Reentry can feel like standing in a storm. Chaplin’s book offers a calm place to process what’s swirling around. The structure keeps you from jumping too quickly into “what’s next” and gives you permission to sit with “what just happened?”
2. The Questions Are Powerful
This isn’t fluff. Chaplin asks the questions most of us avoid:
What did you love and lose?
Where do you feel unresolved?
How did your time abroad change your view of God, self, others, and the world?
Even if you’re not coming from a religious perspective, these questions hit deep emotional and psychological layers that are vital to work through.
3. It Honors the Experience
So often, returning feels like being forgotten. But this book says, “Wait. Your story matters. Let’s walk through it.” It dignifies the experience of living cross-culturally—and the equally important experience of coming home.
This book is best for:
Expats, aid workers, missionaries, and global nomads returning after an extended time abroad
Coaches or team leaders facilitating reentry conversations
Anyone feeling disoriented or unmoored by repatriation, even if you’ve been home for a while
And while it has a faith-based lens, much of it is universally applicable, especially for those who appreciate a values-based reflection process.
Why It Matters
We don’t just need information after we return—we need integration. We need a way to weave our experiences abroad into who we are now, and who we’re becoming. Returning Well is one of the few resources out there that truly helps you do that.
“We do not learn from experience… we learn from reflecting on experience.”
If You’re Looking for More
If Returning Well sounds like a tool you’d benefit from, I also recommend checking out:
• My Hero’s Return coaching cohort, where we use a similar reflective process but with added structure, support, and community.
• My Quick Start Processing Journal, if you’re not ready for a full cohort but want to begin thinking through your return in a structured, empowering way.
Reflection Question:
What’s one question you’ve been avoiding as you think about your time abroad—and what might change if you had the courage to sit with it?